Coverage of Terry Baker Primary Election Party

By Eric Beasley

To complete our thorough coverage of the 6th District Republican Primary, I trekked my up into Amish County…. Er… I mean literally a stones throw away from the MD/PA line in Washington County to attend the Terry Baker primary party. At least there’s one person on the Baker campaign that actually likes me.

Despite my affiliation with Voldermort, the Baker campaign team was welcoming to this intrepid reporter. It helps that the Campaign Jefe is an old Bongino buddy of mine.

The Primary party was not a blockbuster schindig by any means, just a little side party room at the Hoffman’s All American Grill. The crowd, while not massive, was definitely clear in their support of the good Commissioner.

Starting around 8pm, the room filled up quickly, along with a kids area on the far end. Boy, those kids really liked the Baker colored balloons.

Leading up to the announcement of the results, spirits were high. The attendees spoke with confidence about Baker narrowly winning the 6th District Primary.

Commissioner Baker came in around 8:40 after completing the world tour; being at a polling station in every county at some point during the day. Greeted by his family, Baker seemed mostly unphased by the long day spanning over 300 miles of this gerrymandered nonsense.

Right before the results started rolling in, there were slightly over 30 people here. I sat at a table with Wayne Keefer, Roy Queen, Syed Mehdi, and Jerry DeWolf. As the results rolling, yours truly exclaimed “There’s no way in hell Ficker-Booger-Picker is doing well.” The totals from early voting stunned those around the table, many of whom expected Baker to do much better in the western areas.

Some reason fell over the table, early voters are the people who knew who they were voting for long ago and were unlikely to be swayed by electioneering. Pensive attention to the computer and tablet screens returned.

Around 10:25 or so the website updated itself again. Slowly but surely the gap between Baker and Hoeber closed. The crowd around the table remained optimistic about the results. Lots of conjecture and pouring over the results. Probably the most common observation, how did Hoeber perform so well in Garrett and Allegany County? That might be a good subject for a radio show.

Around 10:40 a video came across my feed. Pretty sure it was the victory speech of Hoeber, recorded by the other half of A Miner Detail.

After telling Jerry, there was a noticeable shift in the attitude of the room. We’ve all been there, it goes from excited and happy to a somber self-reflection. Plainly, I was across the table when Jerry told Baker that it would take 5,000 votes to make up the deficit. They shook hands and decided it was time to call the party over.

There was some discussion about whether or not Baker should call Hoeber and congratulate her. I’m going to leave the opinions of specific people out of this article, but I did voice my opinion in support of giving her a phone call. There’s no reason to be a sore loser.

As with most campaigns, glimmers of hope emerge slowly at the end. Can a win be pulled off? Is the gap closing fast enough? A shift in reporting shortly after a pseudo-concession speech changed the mood yet again. Baker is not going to be conceding quite yet, there is only 3,700 votes separating the two and a few precincts left to count.

Personally, I have an hour drive to go home, so any last minute “Dewey Defeats Truman” moments are going to have wait until the morning.

Eric Beasley Administrator

The Government is here to help you. The government has ALWAYS been here to help you. Soylent green is not people. There are 5 lights. Darmok and Jalad at Tanagra, Shaka when the walls fell. The Capitol has the best interests of all the Districts in mind. None of these sentences are being said under violent threat. These are my sincere beliefs. – E.A.B.

About the Author

Eric Beasley
After a year fighting bears and chopping wood in the forest, a Cancer has emerged in Frederick County. The only way to kill Cancer is with fire, and casting a ballot.

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